Slightly Inappropriate
by Felix02
Summary: A light series following Sakura's daily misadventures as she deals with crazy friends, excessive drinking, boring missions, gossip mongering, and one annoying white haired shinobi. Eventual Kaka/Saku. New Chapter: Six Truths.
1. Money, Money, Money

**I do not own Naruto. **I'm writing about an older, more 'mature' version of Sakura (around 26 or 27 years old) in this new story of mine. It's going to be...interesting if not slightly crazy - hence the title - writing about how Sakura _might_ turn out in the future!

Furthermore, there will be a Kakashi/Sakura pairing since I can't resist writing about them, but as a warning to hopeful romantics the pairing won't be the center of attention until much later, if at all. These are fun snippets about Sakura's daily life and conversations.

Warning: This story is Slice of Life. There is no huge plot and is rated M for foul language. These postings will be short, and, while not necessarily all interconnecting, will sometimes refer to each other so I recommend reading them in order. I will though at times have mini-arcs and those will need to be read in order, if you want the whole gist of their story that is.

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Why do you take all these A-ranked missions?" Ino asked regarding Sakura swill her beer.

"Because I damn well can that's why," Sakura paused momentarily before continuing. "And I like money. Yeah, the money is pretty great."

"You have no life." Ino pointed out taking a sip of her own drink.

_It was true._

Sakura sipped her beer. "Yeah, but my savings account is awesome."


	2. Animal Attraction

**Standard disclaimer applies.** Thanks for the reviews. I wasn't actually expecting any since the first chapter was so short (along with the fact that this fic is, well, somewhat pointless). Anyway, thanks again and I hope you enjoy today's snippet.

**The Daily Misadventures of Haruno Sakura**

"Kiba's an ass and a man-slut, it's shameful." But at least he'd bought them a round of shots before his cock took over his brain and lead him away to the other side of the bar.

Tenten nodded sagely. Drunkenly. "That girl is so out of his league."

Sakura glanced at said man-slut and the woman he was practically drooling over, and it was weird for everybody. She needed another drink, stat!

"Word on the block is that she's a _bitch_, so it's only natural an Inuzuka would go after her." Sakura gave a sideway glance to Tenten. "Ino is going to be pissed."

Tenten's eyebrow rose. "They're going out?" Sakura shot her a look, her mouth twisting at the corners, and Tenten caught on. "Oh, right. Wrong word. Can I tell her?"

"Hell no, I'm going to tell her. You know how much fun I'm going to get out of that? My fun quota for the month is going to be taken care of in one night. One fucking night! It's going to be a shit-show."

"Fucking-A." Tenten agreed.


	3. Ichiraku Experience

**Standard disclaimer applies.** As always, thank you reviewers and those anonymous readers as well. I'm glad you're enjoying these little writings.

Now to address a reviewer: The length of these chapters will vary, but since I want to keep them short in length don't necessary expect anything more than a page in length. Expect short chapters. In return, I will try to update this everyday or at least a few times a week. Anyway, I'm glad that the reviewer likes my writing enough to want more. Thanks!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"For the zillionth time, Naruto, I don't care what the hell you're going to order, just do it already!"

Naruto's face soured. "Damn, Sakura, calm down. You're ruining the Ichiraku experience."

"It can only be called an experience when one doesn't experience it three times a day seven days a week." Sakura shot back. She only ate ramen when drunk and was she drunk? No, this _temple_ had been alcohol free for two days and it was grating on her.

"I do go on missions, Sakura-chan, I'm not always here. I thought you'd be smart enough to know that." Naruto said laughing, enjoying his own company immensely.

"I need a drink."

Naruto passed her a glass. "Here's some water."

"Fuck me."

"Really?" Naruto voiced brightly.

"NO!"


	4. Tricking a Copy Nin

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Finally, a chapter with Kakashi! I wasn't actually planning on posting this snippet till a few chapters from now, but decided that I should at least introduce this future pairing. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Kakashi, I need a favor." Sakura said running along side the silver haired nin.

"No."

She frowned. "Don't be a douche, _sensei_, and hear me out."

Kakashi smiled beneath his mask, his eye crinkling a little too nicely. "I stopped doing favors for you when you tricked me into taking your place on a mission with Gai."

"You have to admit that I was pretty damn clever," Sakura laughed and winked, "to trick the famous Copy-Nin himself."

Said shinobi didn't look very amused.

"Not even proud of me?" She pushed.

He sighed lowering his book and admitted, though painfully, "A little."

"Want to do me a favor?"

"I said no."


	5. Glorified Babysitter

**Standard disclaimer applies.** Thank you again to everyone who is reading and (hopefully) enjoying this!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Konohamaru stared at her with wide eyes. "You're our team leader?"

Sakura scratched the back of her neck and yawned, "I know, don't remind me how much this mission is going to suck – I'm nothing but a glorified baby-sitter here. "

"You know I'm twenty-one, right?"

Sakura's eye snapped open. "Eh, no kidding?"

He frowned.

"Damn, I'm getting old."

"You look it too." He snickered and didn't remember anything after that.


	6. Roommates

**Standard disclaimer applies. **

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"No, it wouldn't be a good idea to move in together."

Sai blinked, confused. "Why?" He read in a book friends moved in together to save money and Sakura was his friend and unmarried, but when he explained as much the woman grunted.

"You'd cramp my style."

"But you have no style." Sai pointed out barely avoiding a chakra infused punch.

"Care to try again, Sai?" Sakura asked wickedly, her fingers twitching.

Sai frowned. Try asking her to move in together again? But she just said no. Women were confusing creatures.

"Would you consider moving in with me?" He bowed politely.

Sakura considered smacking him upside the head for a brief moment before an idea hit her.

"No way!" Sai cringed as she touched him on the shoulder gently, a bit too gently. "But you should definitely ask Ino. Tell her you thought of her specifically because you know she loves male company."

"Why?"

"Because it will make her feel special." Sakura winked at Sai as she sent him off. "Good luck."


	7. Relationship Problems

**Standard disclaimer applies. **

I hope you'll enjoy this chapter, yet another one where Sakura is drinking...

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"When I was eighteen, Tsunade sent me on a prolonged mission with Anko." Sakura guzzled down a whole bottle of beer as if to make her point.

Hinata twiddled her thumbs, her drink untouched. "Ano – Sakura, I didn't ask about that…"

Sakura slapped the table, her eyes half open and face red, as she accused, "Yes, Hinata, you did ask that!"

"Um…I – um," she straightened her back and raised her face, her expression determined. "I asked what made you change…from when we were teens."

"Bah, and I gave you my answer. Listen, Hinata," Sakura whispered. "If you want to change go spend time with Anko. Don't give me that look – I know she is a complete bitch, but she grabs you by the balls and yanks you this way and that and by the time she's done you have a whole new perspective on life."

Hinata blushed. "I don't have…balls."

"God-damn, Hinata, I'm not being literal!" Sakura scooted next to the woman, leaned in very close, and stared. Hinata started sputtering.

"You've changed too since we were young," Sakura said with a lop-sided grin. "I like you the way you are. Don't worry, stupid-ass Naruto will come to his senses and come back to you."

"How did you know?" The woman's surprise made her voice surprisingly firm.

Sakura shrugged. "It's been a while since Naruto's made an idiotic mistake – it was only a matter of time. Plus, you look like shit. Don't worry too much, Naruto is just scared shitless."

"Of what?"

"Of you," Sakura explained with a meaning jab. "Well, it would be more accurate to say of loosing you."

"Oh," the woman whispered.

"Fuck that noise," Sakura growled standing up. "We should go beat him the hell up right fucking now! I will go first, sneak into his apartment, immobilize him, and then you can go all out on the dickless fool. Come on!"

With that Sakura dragged one Hyuga heiress out of her apartment.


	8. Perks

**A/N:** I accidentally posted the wrong chapter as Chapter 8. This was the chapter I meant to post, so forgive me for deleting and re-posting a chapter. :S

**Standard disclaimer applies. **

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

When she woke up, Kakashi was sitting on the windowsill reading. "I heard from a _small bird_ about what you did for Hinata."

"You mean an ink bird. Fucking, Sai! He's always in my business."

Kakashi's eye crinkled knowingly. "And it's highly unprofessional to fall asleep at work, Sakura."

Sakura was in fact in her office. Not that she had any clue as to how she had gotten there. She remembered dragging Hinata to Naruto's and then…nothing. Meh.

"I run this shit." That shit being the hospital, and it was explanation enough.

"Language, Sakura. You never cussed like this when you were younger."

"I also never kicked your ass when I was younger, but things have changed so who knows what would happen." Sakura punched her fist suggestively.

Kakashi held up one finger. "First, you're clearly hung over and smell like a few too many Long Islands." _It was true_. "Second, you're about ten years too young to beat me."

"And _I _think you're ten years too old to fight me. Wouldn't want you walking away with a slipped a disc, ojisan."

The white haired nin's eye narrowed. "Forty is not old."

"Eh, you're right. It's ancient."


	9. Mothers and Daughters

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Okay, here's a question: I have the next fifteen or so chapters completed already, but do y'all have any personal requests? What I'm trying to say rather badly is if you have any situations (or characters) you want to see Sakura deal with just tell me and I'll write up a chapter on them.

As always, thanks and enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Sakura," her mother's worried voice was a bad omen. "You've changed so much."

"That's what happens when you become a bad-ass."

"Honey – Wait, did you just curse?"

_Oh, shit._ "Uh…no?"

Her mother didn't seem too pleased, and by the time the happy mother-daughter reunion was finished, Sakura was left wondering when her mother would resume traveling again.


	10. Paperwork

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Sorry about the **huge** delay! FanFiction has been having a lot of errors with me and other users so I haven't been able to update in forever! Thankfully, I was able to find out what to do by browsing yahoo answers where I found this little tid-bit out: when you click on edit story and the error 2 page cames up, all you simply had to do was look at the page's url and replace the word _properties_ with the word _content_. Hopefully, this will help any of y'all who've been having the same problems. I don't know if this will work for long, but it's helped me get this chapter out.

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Shishou, the paperwork?"

Tsunade furtively glanced at the mess of files and scrolls on her desk. "Sakura, it's Friday."

"Being Hokage is a twenty-four hour, seven day a week job."

Tsunade leaned back in her chair. "How about a drink, on me?"

Sakura looked between the older woman and her paperwork on the desk. "You know Shizune can handle this."

"My thoughts exactly."


	11. Besides the Point

**Standard disclaimer applies**. _Ugh._ Sorry about all the late updates and such. With the ongoing technical difficulties and the retreat I was guilt-tripped into attending, I haven't been able to post as much as I would like. Well, here is the next chapter. I hope y'all find some amusement in it. Oh, and _just as a side note_, I don't think knitting or crocheting is lame or anything like that!

And, again, if any one has any suggestions for chapters I would love to hear them. I have an upcoming mini-series in this fic about Sakura's birthday, and I can tell you now that sheer craziness will occur.

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"I'm sick of you two leaving me with all the paperwork." Sakura refrained from rolling her eyes knowing the woman would see it, and knowing there would be hell to pay if such an action was followed through. Besdies, Sakura was used to the conversation. It always happened after she and Tsunade abandoned Shziune with work when they went out drinking...like last night for example, and she did feel a little, little bit bad.

"Shizune, don't be so melodramatic." Sakura teased anyway flipping through mission files, unaware of the other woman's increasing ire.

"Why can't I ever go out drinking, why can't I have fun?"

Sakura stopped her flipping motions, her eyebrow rising. "You don't like drinking." And she didn't. Shizune's lectures over the vices and evils of alcohol were well known in Konoha.

"That's besides the point!"

The flipping motion resumed. "Well, what do you want to do?" Making amends was necessary evil, especially in her life. What did that say about _her_? Thankfully those thoughts didn't make it far because of Shizune's answer.

"Crochet." The older woman's eyes practically glowed. Tonton oink-ed appreciatively. Sakura tore the page she was currently flipping, and there was a profound silence where the two women stared at one another blankly.

...

"Shizune, please tell me you weren't always this lame."


	12. Dirty Vessels

**Standard disclaimer applies. **I'm not too pleased with this chapter, but I think it turned out all right. The point of this chapter is pretty funny - well at least to me.

Thank you to everyone who reads and reviews,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Sakura, I want a girlfriend."

"Are you asking me or telling me?" Sakura snapped irritably scrounging around the papers on her desk. Where the hell did she put…_wait one fucking second_ "Did you just say you wanted a girlfriend?"

Sai nodded. Fearing the worst, she pointed towards him accusingly, "You're not asking me right?"

"Why, would you like the position?"

"No offense, Sai, but fuck that."

The man sighed crossing his arms. "Can you get me a girlfriend? I read in a book that friends, especially female friends, play the role of matchmaker." He pinned her with a Sai-smile. "You are my friend right, Sakura?"

Feeling like she was walking into a trap yet unable to stop herself Sakura nodded, and an even creepier Sai smile bloomed.

"Then you'll get me a girlfriend, right?"

It was hopeless. Sai was her teammate - smart, dependable, strong, but more than that he was stupid as fuck when it came to dealing with the real world. A girlfriend could be a good thing for him, but why did he have to come to her?

"Can I just buy you a prostitute?"

His expression turned into an odd mixture of mildly offended and frightened. "I will not place _my penis_ in a dirty _vessel_."

_Vessel?_ Sakura thought blankly. She had her work cut out for her.


	13. Payback

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Sakura discusses her new problem with her ex-sensei, a small continuation of the last chapter.

Thank you to everyone who reads and reviews,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Sai wants a girlfriend."

Kakashi blinked lazily. "Did he ask you?"

Sakura sighed laying down on the grassy field. "He asked if I was interested in the position."

"Position?" Kakashi laughed settling down next to her and nodded thoughtfully. "I wonder if I've been going about this dating business all wrong."

"You date?" Flipping back through her memories, Sakura couldn't recall one woman Kakashi had a relationship with that didn't revolve around sex. She wondered vaguely why he never had a real relationship, for there were many rumors of his sexcapades but never any about a real girlfriend. Sakura filed the thought away.

"Why, you interested?"

If this was how she was getting ask out nowadays her life was officially over. "Fuck you."

Kakashi's eye crinkled in a smile. "Language, Sakura," he tsked.

She sat up and turned towards Kakashi with her hands out and blurted, "He asked me to get him a girlfriend. I mean I offered to buy him a prostitute, being a good friend and all, but he freaked and told me that he wouldn't place his penis into a dirty vessel."

"Smart man." Kakashi whistled.

"He called a woman a vessel, Kakashi! I can't work with that." Kakashi shrugged opening his kunai pouch and reaching for _Icha Icha Paradise_. "You can try to help me, you know."

"You'll figure it out, Sakura-chan."

"This is payback for me calling you old, isn't it?"

Kakashi crossed his arms behind his head. "You make me sound so vindictive."

"You are!" He merely smiled again. "Bastard."

"Good luck with, Sai." Kakashi offered genially. Sakura bit her tongue, prayed for patience, and hoped to God that Ino would be up for getting wasted in the afternoon. Be it trashy or not, this was an emergency and alcohol was definitely needed.


	14. That's Confidential

**Standard disclaimer applies.** Another installment of Sakura's problem, this time she's discussing it with her fellow kunoichi with a surprise visit from…!

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"But what woman in her right mind would go out with Sai?" Sakura complained swallowing her beer.

Ino crossed her arms over her ample bosom. "Hmm…that's a valid question."

"We need someone who is able to hold her own." Tenten advised.

"Someone who's…bossy." Hinata added gently.

"A woman with huge bazongas!" Anko snorted pulling out a seat and sitting down uninvited. Ino eyed the older woman wearily.

"Why do you say that?" Tenten asked curiously.

Hinata blushed. "What's a bazonga?"

"It's slang for breasts." Sakura explained to the quieter woman, grinning at Anko who sat with her legs open.

"Hooters, fun bags, puppies, milk wagons, globes, bijongas, chesticles, flapdoodles, chumbawumbas, dingleboppers, cantaloupes, gazongas, God's milk bottles, melons, nose warmers - "

"Enough! We get it, we get it!" Ino shouted. Anko shrugged. "Why does it matter?"

"Ino, I'm shocked _you_ asked that."

"Want to take this outside, bitch?" Ino stood up slapping the table.

"Maybe later. Listen, that man-boy has got large breast fetish."

"And how do you know that, Anko?" Sakura asked stepping in as she watched Ino seethe. A smile tugged on her lips.

The older woman yawned picking at her cuticles. "That's _confidentia_l."

Anko and her chest were suddenly the center of attention.

"I think I'm going to be sick." Tenten muttered.


	15. Bar Hopping

**Standard disclaimer applies**. So I'm making Sakura's night out with the girl's into a little-bitty arc. Who knows if they'll be funny or not, but it's going to include the last chapter, this chapter, and then the next two chappies. They may seem crazy or stupid to some people, but believe me they aren't unrealistic. Of course, I'm drawing on memories of what my friends and I do…Public Service Announcement: Party Safe, Drink Safer. (My good deed for the day is done.)

A reviewer inspired the fishnets in this chapter. :)

Thanks for reading,  
Enjoy

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"I don't know why you hang out with her, forehead." Ino complained as they left the bar, as if Anko wasn't right next to them, but Sakura was too disappointed to pay any attention to her at that moment. She hadn't been able to get her drink on as much as she would have liked and that was a shame.

Anko cackled bringing Sakura out of her drink-less musings. "Sounds like someone's got a girl crush."

Tenten smiled. "You two are funny."

"Don't you have to be somewhere?" Ino continued glaring at the fishnet covered kunoichi. "Torturing Gai, corrupting Kurenai's kid, categorizing your endless supply of fishnets?"

"I'm totally feeling the love," Sakura snorted and gently shoved Hinata, who wasn't used to the love-hate (mostly hate) relationship between Anko and Ino, and was sporting a pair of wide, slightly bewildered eyes.

"Nah, Kurenai's banished me from her household after I ordered porn on her TV. How was I supposed to know little Kish was there?"

"You were babysitting." Tenten pointed out.

"Kish's like what – ten, fifteen? - "

"She's eleven." Sakura corrected watching Ino's darkening expression.

"- point is the kid's old enough to take care of herself." Anko finished as if she hadn't been interrupted. "Oh, look, Ino, a girl who looks looser than you! You should go say hi and have a hoe-off!"

With that the dark haired woman pulled the blond across the street and into another bar.

"Whose up for another round of drinking?" Tenten asked following at a more sedate pace.

Sakura stared at bar and it looked trashy as all hell. "Looks like my type of place." She punched her fist. "Let's get sick."

Hinata shook her head. "I'm going home now…"

Looking back, it was the smart choice.


	16. Half Birthday Shots

**Standard disclaimer applies.** There are three types of scenes which are difficult to write well - the first being a physical fight, the second a lemon, and the third is a scene where people are drunk. I'm sure this is not the case for everyone but is very much so for me. Surprisingly, the most difficult scene of all to portray is one where everyone is drunk (for me). Thus, you have this chapter.

I had to pull from what my friends and I usually do when intoxicated and so writing this was like walking down memory lane, a very serpentine and unpaved lane that is. Anyway, I hope y'all will enjoy this next segment in this little arc.

And again, good deed for the day, _Party Safe, Drink Safer_.

Thanks for reading,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sometime during the night Genma kissed Sakura. Or rather it would be more accurate to state that _she_ kissed Genma. Taking it a step further, it would be _most_ accurate to say that the kiss was more like slobbery open-mouthed sucking motion.

"Why did I kiss you?" Sakura slurred and somewhat licked against Genma's ear.

Genma, who was equally drunk, didn't notice his wet ear, and if he did he might have thought it was sexy as hell given his state of mind. "It's my half birthday, but don't tell Kakashi you kissed me."

"Birthday boy!" Sakura smiled and ignored the last comment in favor for reaching around him and picking up her ninth (twelfth, fourteenth?) shot. "Half birthday shots!"

"Half birthday shots," Anko shouted climbing over the bar and falling next to Sakura in her rush to get over. "Half birthday shots are doubles! It's the ruuulee! Life or death!"

"When the hell did you get here?" Genma blinked lazily letting go of Sakura who stumbled backwards as her knees gave out.

"When I sensed half birthday shots." Anko spun towards the bartender. "Hey, double shots of your crappiest vodka right here, right now. Double shot because one, we can and two, to hold you over till your real birthday." She added wobbling on her feet but managing to pull off an awe-inspiring air punch. "Let's do this, bitches!"

"Half birthday shots are the best." Genma slurred trying to high five the bartender who succeeded in ignoring him. "Whose half birthday is it?"

Sakura grinned slapping his back. "Bonzai!" Genma faced planted onto the bar. "_Oops_."

Tenten stumbled onto the group. "Do we have to get half birthday presents?"

"You can kiss me. I'll even take my senbon out this time." Genma was quick to recover.

Tenten took her shot glass from Anko. "No, you slobbered over Sakura."

"Shots!" Anko cut into the conversation. "If you can't swallow it all, party foul. Ino shouldn't have a problem with that though."

And across the room one could hear "What did you say, bitch?" but no one really cared.

It was half birthday shots time.


	17. Pink's Pastry Shop

**Standard disclaimer applies**. A reviewer asked me if Kakashi would show up in this arc, but I am sorry to report that he will not since this is the last chappie of the _Sakura Has A Problem, Solution: Let's Get Drunk Arc_. Yes, I just now named it and it's awesome. (No worries, **Black Mirror**, Kakashi will be in the next chapter.) I still have to name the ongoing Sai needs a girlfriend arc, but it's really not that big of a deal. I actually have a few mini-arcs coming up, but the rest of the time I will be going back to random conversations.

Anyway,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sakura yawned leaning over the wall her body no longer able to support itself. "How did we get stuck with wall patrol?"

Tenten, ever chipper, especially when she was sober, laughed. "Don't remember?"

Sakura rubbed her head, the memory from last night gone, but lingering headache was a painful reminder that something did indeed happen. "I should really stop drinking. Well, what did we do?"

Tenten blushed. "Come and ask me when you get the bill from Pink."

"The bookstore?" Sakura grumbled thinking about the place where Kakashi frequently bought his naughty yet deliciously interesting books.

"No, their twenty-four pastry shop downtown."

Their pastry shop…Sakura blushed and looked out into the forest, her mind abuzz with all sorts of horrible, embarrassing scenarios. "Ugh, please don't tell me it involved a huge cake."

"It did."

"And were we in said cake?"

"Another genius idea of yours gone bad," Tenten laughed though she had been just as involved in the event as Sakura.

"And please don't tell me it was delivered to the wrong address."

Tenten nudged her. "You're a glutton for punishment, aren't you?"

"And who exactly were we delivered to?"

"We were supposed to go to Genma since you thought it would have been a wonderful half birthday present for him." That more than anything was a sure sign she had been plastered. "But somehow we ended up getting delivered to Ibiki."

Ugh! It was worst that she thought. Sakura wanted to retch.

"Luckily for us Ibiki found it hilarious and placed us here, in his words, 'to work off our hangovers'. What a cruel bastard. No wonder he heads Anbu's Torture and Interrogation."

Sakura glared at the smiling woman. "You aren't mad?"

"Nah, it's always an adventure with you."


	18. Awkward Realizations

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Some people might be crying foul after reading this chapter, but I am sure no one will really mind.

My explanation will come after this chapter so in the meantime,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sakura hung herself over a low rising wall and watched Kakashi read his book. He sat against the wall seemingly oblivious to the world, but Sakura knew better. Hatake Kakashi was never off guard unless (as this was a big if) he was suffering through really dreadful bowel movement issues, because really who could stay focused on anything other than…

"Good afternoon, Sakura." He looked up and gave her one crinkle eyed smile, his face half in the sun and half in shadow, and for one insane moment everything faded except him. Her heart fluttered and her chest contracted tightly to the point of vague discomfort.

Kakashi's eye opened and he frowned. "Sakura, it's rude to ignore your ex-sensei." He teased, but she didn't hear him with all the buzzing in her head. What the hell was that? She did not just think Kakashi was handsome. No way! All that drinking last night might have severely altered her brain. She blamed Anko.

When she didn't answer in favor of continually starring at him awkwardly, Kakashi opted for another approach. "You seemed flushed, are you well? I heard about your wild night. Hangover still bothering you?"

But Sakura still wasn't really listening to him, his words just weren't processing because she was caught in the middle of another mind crippling crisis. No doubt Kakashi was attractive, especially with that annoyingly mysterious mask on, but to actually think him handsome. Sakura did a mental head grab and shook. This was her ex-sensei. Sure they hadn't had that relationship in - Sakura thought and did a mental frown – almost over ten years, but there were some lines best left uncrossed.

Kakashi tapped her forehead. "Sakura?" Shit, she hadn't been starring had she? Kakashi smiled. She had, damn. "Maybe you should go back to bed."

"Did you hear about the cake?" Sakura ventured feeling her equilibrium returning and trying to play off her awkward staring with awkward conversation.

Besides, it was Kakashi. _Kakashi!_ He was her friend in some _hey-I-was-once-your-student-but-now-I'm-a-bad-ass-and-no-longer-your-student _type of way. They had a history. He saved her life a few times, she tricked him into going on missions with Gai, he made her life a living hell at times, she hid his beloved plant across the village, and so on and so forth – history. So Kakashi was attractive, what was the big deal? A lot of men were attractive. No big. It would only make her friendship with him more…

"What cake?"

…fun, right?

**A/N**: Some people might think this is rushing things a bit? I don't. Remember that I began writing these little chapters right in the middle of their lives so it's not like they were strangers and then bang attraction. (And there is no way in hell I am writing about over ten years worth of interactions because not only would I get bored but y'all would flat out stop reading.)

Once more, Sakura doesn't like him in any romantic manner yet - she just realized that he's handsome and attractive when before she just noted it in some off handed manner. Usually insights like this come after major events but sometimes they can come by simple occurrences…like the right type of lighting. Haha.


	19. What Dreams Are Made Of

**Standard disclaimer applies. **This is a very short chapter so I hope you forgive me. The next chapter will not be as short as this. Promise. Anyway, I have no idea what Kurenai's and Asuma's kid is named, but I referred to her once before in _Bar Hopping_ by the name of Kish.

I don't like Ocs my stories if I can help it, but I don't necessarily consider Kish an OC…I mean she will eventually exist in Naruto. I have to admit that I have no idea what the kid's gender or name will be but whatever. (This goes with Sakura's mother too. You did hear her voice in like episode 3 or something – as for in the manga I have no about the mother business as I started reading Naruto around chapter 34.)

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"Ah, I remember when I used to have dreams." Sakura said lying down on the hill.

"What do you have now?" Kish asked playing with her new kunai.

"Alcohol." Then, after thinking about it, grimaced. "Don't tell your mom I said that."


	20. Dango Day Mystery

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Kanpo is a legit Naruto character that some of you might remember from the chunin exams. I think he took care of Neji after Naruto beat the crap out of him…I could be wrong about that but I know for a fact that he does exist, he's around Kakashi's age, and he is a medic-nin.

This chapter came to me in that weird stage between sleep and wakefulness that you experience when you're slowly waking up but don't want to. I said to myself that I should probably write it down but then I think I fell back to sleep again. I'm glad I remembered it hours later though I really had to concentrate on remembering what it was.

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

It was dango day.

Dango days were special days in Sakura's book and they only happened three times a week. Monday and Wednesday had passed in dango bliss, but today – Friday – was a different story. There would be no sweet dangos today because the hospital was overbooked, her schedule packed, and because of that there were no breaks. Bathroom breaks were barely tolerated.

And so that's why Sakura was surprised when she walked into her office and smelled one of her favorite scents in the entire world. It was the end of the day, actually it was long past the end, it was the almost the beginning of Saturday, but there on her desk was a box of dangos from her favorite restaurant.

For a moment, Sakura just stared at the white box. There was no note, no indication of who brought it to her, and instead of being thankful and stuffing her face full with dangos she did the opposite.

"Kanpo," she screamed. "Someone's trying to poison me!"

There was thud followed by her office door slamming open revealing a stressed out looking man, his hair messy and medic uniform crumbled as if he'd just been lying down. This was a big deal because Kanpo was leveled headed and neat in everything he did, but it had been a long day and he no doubt passed out somewhere for a half a second before she screamed. The man had been working longer hours than she had and that was saying something.

"What, what's wrong? Who's trying to poison you?" He asked looking around her office. Sakura pointed to the box. "They're dangos," was his stupefied realization.

"Yes," she had by now picked up the box and was shaking it. "It's a box of dangos, dangos that I love, dangos I was unable eat today but somehow ended up in my office."

Kanpo expression became slack. "Maybe someone was thinking about you?"

"_Who_ would do that?" Sakura snorted opening the box and drooling on sight. "Well, I_ am_ at the hospital and if they _are_ poisoned I would be fine…probably…" her voice slowly faded out, and Kanpo thought he was in the clear until she pinned him with an accusatory look. "Unless, _you_ deposited the box here and poisoned them yourself in hopes that I would die so you could take over my position."

"You're kidding right?" He asked flatly. "I've been right beside you the whole day."

"A shinobi must always be aware of foul play." Sakura mused even as her hand descended into the box to pick up a dango stick. "Though deliciousness must not be ignored either."

"They'll go right to your thighs." Only Kanpo could deliver a killer line like that and not have her go ballistic. His tone was just too factual, and so instead of rampaging around her office Sakura sighed and pinched her stomach. She had been gaining a little bit of weight. "Besides, they're cold."

"Any type of dango is a good dango!" Sakura shouted back but didn't stop him as he took the box from her and placed it in the trash.

"You'll thank me later." Kanpo smiled. Sakura made a noise in between a snort and a growl. "Besides, you're right, they could have been poisoned."

"Now you're just making fun of me."

Kanpo laughed tiredly. "Perhaps."

**A/N:** Just who gave her those dangos? Were they poisoned? Will Sakura be tempted to eat them from her trashcan the following day despite the risks? Will Kanpo be around to stop her and save her thighs? I know I would eat those dangos! I know you would too especially if they were still in the box.


	21. One Upping

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Shino finally makes an appearance. Yay! I have to say writing him was somewhat awkward for me since this was my first time. You could say I popped my Shino-cherry…Okay, so that was gross. Another, milder way to put it is that I passed yet another Naruto milestone. Yay again!

As for his personality, I've always thought of Shino as having a mild dramatic streak even if he himself doesn't realize it.

So without further ado,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Shino!" The tall, silent man pushed up his glasses, untouched by Sakura's boisterous voice.

"Haruno," he greeted in that silent way of his.

"I'm so glad I found you," Sakura huffed breathing heavily. "I've been looking around the whole freaking village, where were you?"

"Around."

"Can you be any more vague?" Sakura shot back sarcastically.

"You were looking for me." He stated turning around so he could fully face the pink haired woman.

"I have a problem…a little-big problem." Shino raised an eyebrow. Sakura twiddled her thumbs, unsure of how to continue but thinking it best just to get it out and regret her decision later. So she went for it.

"Mind getting rid of some bedbugs for me?"

"That's not my job." He turned away from her and began walking away.

"Please, I'll do anything. ANYTHING!"

Shino paused dramatically. "…Anything?"

Sakura eyed him. "NOT THAT!"

Shino sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose thinking of their interactions over the years. "Why must you always assume I desire sexual favors from you?"

"Because I'm hot stuff." Sakura laughed at his non-expression. "Anyway, what you do want me to do?"

"Stop Kiba from pestering me for a week and I'll help you."

Sakura's face soured. "I think I'd rather sleep with you."

"Ah," he began. "But I'd rather not."


	22. Guys with Glasses

**Standard disclaimer applies**. Sorry that I haven't updated in a few days. I've been both tired and indecisive (about which snippet I wanted to post), but eventually I dragged myself out of my exhaustion and choose this following chapter. (F.Y.I: Mozuku is a legit Naruto character.)

As always,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sakura tapped her fingers on the table and waited. And waited.

…And waited.

And then waited some more.

Then, for good measure, waited even longer until she reached boiling point. "Oh my God, Ino, get your ass out of there before I rot!"

"SHUT UP, Forehead! Who asked for your useless opinion?" The blonde roared from behind the curtain.

"You did!" The store clerks stared her way, a mixture of curiosity and horror, but wisely said nothing and stayed away. "You asked for my opinion when you dragged me out of the hospital and brought me here. Just face it, Pig, you look fat in whatever the hell you tried on so let's go."

"You haven't even seen what I'm wearing!" Ino shouted back. The red curtain ruffled but remained closed. "And I'm not fat. I'm fucking beautiful."

"Can we please just go?"

The curtain opened revealing Ino in all her glory. If Sakura was honest, which she was when the mood or situation suited her, she would have said that Ino looked amazing. The dress was short yet trendy with a high neckline, no back, and was so tight that it showed every rounded curve of Ino's hourglass figure. Once more, it was red, murder fucking red.

"Jealous much?" Ino winked striking a pose.

_Yes._ But as if she would ever admit to it. Sakura smirked crossing her arms. "Only about the amount of money you're going to be getting by the hour."

Ino rolled her eyes. "If you're interested, and I know you are, my prey is Mozuku."

Sakura's mouth dropped. "Mozuku as in the Mozuku who works under your dad?"

"The one and only," Ino laughed.

"What does your dad think of you?" Sakura scoffed rolling her eyes yet was extremely amused nevertheless. Those guys in Torture and Interrogation didn't get out much, and because of that Sakura didn't know too much about Mozuku, couldn't even recall his face in detail, but had heard that he was a decent enough guy.

Ino shrugged going back into the fitting room the curtain swooshing close behind her. "What papa doesn't know can't hurt him. Besides," Ino added peeking out from behind the curtain. "I can't resist guys with glasses."

A guy in glasses, eh? When she thought of Kakashi in glasses she definitely could resist. The question was why did she even think of him?


	23. Chores with Neji

**Standard disclaimer applies.** Finally, Neji makes an appearance! Too bad I still have to do a few others. Some of those being Rock Lee and Gai…Le sigh. Those will be…difficult to write, but I look forward to them all the same.

So without further ado,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Neji, is that you?" Sakura called out rushing to the adjacent aisle.

Neji, who had two bags in his hands as if he were deciding which one to buy, nodded and greeted her with his customary aloof politeness, "Haruno."

"You're back," she exclaimed with a smile shifting her grocery basket from her left to her right hand. "And grocery shopping."

His brow rose. "I have to eat as well."

Neji had been gone for a few months on some prolonged, most likely, boring mission, and since he no longer lived directly on the Hyuga Estate he had to shop for himself. It was just that Sakura never saw him grocery shopping. The thought had never crossed her mind and seeing him doing something so…domestic was mind-boggling.

Sakura shifted the weight of her food again. "That's true. I didn't hear you were back in the village though, did you just get in?"

"Early this morning." The rest went unsaid, but Sakura suspected he was both hungry and tired and had just come from Tsunade's office. A lot usually went unsaid with Neji.

"You should come drinking with Tenten and I later. It's going to be fun." Sakura said stressing the fun part. Not that he would come. Her record with him was 6:57.

He slightly smirked placing the larger bag into his own basket, decision made. "Have you been dragging my teammate into trouble?"

"No!" Pause. "Why, have you heard something, because if you have it's a dirty lie. People aren't honest, you really have to be more careful, Neji."

The brown haired shinobi looked at her blankly. "I bumped into Ibiki when I left the Hokage."

Sakura snorted. "I'm telling you, Neji, people are weavers of fabrications in this village. They are bored."

"I see."

"I'm glad you do."

**A/N**: I don't know, but seeing Neji doing domestic chores is both sexy and hilarious to me. Besides, I've never seen Neji written in this type of situation (probably because he lives on the Hyuga branch compound or something…).


	24. Naughty Novels

**Standard disclaimer applies.** I know. I know. I'm sorry for not updating. My excuses are as follows: I was super tired, lazy, and having a bit too much fun. Even though I already have a lot of these snippets ready to go and completed updating them is bothersome at times. Again, I'm sorry. I'm posting this chapter as my apology. I was planning on using it later on, but please take this as my treat to you.

And as always,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sakura decided to pull a Kakashi and walk around with her nose stuck in a naughty book. People stared and whispered but eventually got over themselves and her own awesomeness. That was what they must have been whispering about. Or so she tried to tell herself. Sure she could have read it in the comfort of her own apartment, or on some vacant training field, but she was feeling both devious and daring and wanted, dare she say, a Kakashi experience? (The man had been on her mind too much lately.)

And so it was with her nose stuck in a book that she ran into her famous ex-sensei himself. Though the word 'ran' would be an inaccurate description since she'd sensed him, but running into him was a good way to start up a conversation as any.

"Enjoying your book, Sakura?"

Sakura motioned to his own book. "Are you enjoying yours? I see you're reading volume two of Icha Icha Violence. Any good?"

"It's very romantic. How is," he tilted his head slightly to read her book jacket. "_The Lusty Lord of Quivering Mounds_?" He paused. "I can hardly believe someone published a book under that title."

"I bought it at Pink." Sakura explained with a smile. "And it's really dirty. You know no plot, pointless sex, and a whole lot of nothing going on. Love it."

"I've never seen that book at Pink." Kakashi frowned no doubt scouring his memory of the bookstore's bookshelves, though Pink could hardly be called just a bookstore. "And I know Pink."

Sakura smirked. "I wouldn't publicly announce just how pervy you are, Kaka-sensei."

"I don't read books with words like quivering or mounds in the title in public." He pointed out. "Or in private." He added for good measure. "Where was it?"

She waved her book around aimlessly. "In the back…the very back," and at his expression Sakura continued. "I had to basically harass my way into their old storage rooms where, to my pleasure, I found boxes and boxes of dirty vintage novels like these. My next is _The Young Scholar's Cuntry Lessons."_

"You should have left those books in storage." Kakashi managed to say after a few seconds of silence. "There was a reason why they were in storage."

Sakura winked. "I'll let you borrow them when I'm done, okay?"

**A/N:** Erm...as for the titles of those two books, I'm not sure if they are actually names of books or if any other people have used them before. I don't want anyone saying I copyrighted or stole anything.


	25. Mothers and Marriages

**Standard disclaimer applies.** Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter. Y'all are great! In this chapter, Sakura's mother has something important to discuss with her daughter.

As always,

Enjoy

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Your cousin is getting married and she is three years younger than you, Sakura."

Another lunch with her mother and as always it was about marriage. "Yeah, and she's pregnant. Talk about shotgun wedding. I'm not going. Uncle Kazura is going to get plastered and start ranting and make a grab at my ass. No thanks."

Her mother snapped her wrist with a utensil. "Language, young lady."

"You've been implying that I'm old for the past thirty minutes, mom. Make up your mind, woman!"

"Sakura, twenty-six isn't the blossom of youth. I don't care – get pregnant and then married, I know how you young people are, but time's wasting away. I want grandkids and a son-in-law."

"I don't want kids." Sakura crossed her arms and for good measure added, "Or a husband."

Her mother's smile was condescending. "Oh, Sakura, honey, yes you do."


	26. Silence is Golden

**Standard disclaimer applies.** Again, thank you for all your reviews and support. I'm glad that some of y'all like my little snippets. Oh, and just to let you know tomorrow is probably the last day I'm going to post anything because I'm leaving to visit family for Easter. I _might_ be able to post but no promises.

In this chapter, Yamato finally makes an appearance! This chapter is a slight continuation from the last chapter, as you'll see from the conversation. Mothers' voices and pleas are hard to expel from daughters' minds, especially when they are annoying.

And as always,

Enjoy

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Yamato-taicho," Sakura whispered into her headpiece.

"What's up, Sakura?" Silence. "Sakura?"

"Why aren't you married?"

She heard the distinct sound of sputtering on the other end.

"We're on a mission, Sakura. Focus." As if she could forget Sakura thought looking around her treetop vantage point. There was so much God-forsaken foliage that she wouldn't be surprised if some of it ended up her ass.

"Yeah, a mission where fucking nothing is happening. We've been here three days, it's over." And it was true. The target was supposed to show up yesterday at the_ latest_.

"We finish today and then we report back." Yamato sighed heavily.

"I need a drink." Yamato didn't respond so Sakura pushed on. "Taicho, if not married why don't you have a girlfriend?"

"Sakura-"

"It's not like you're ugly."

Silence. Then there was another heavy, masculine sigh. "Maybe we should go back now."

Sakura smiled. "Now that's the spirit, taicho!"


	27. Artificial Insemination

**Standard disclaimer applies.** This might be the last chapter for the week so I'm positing one where Kakashi is present. This is a continuation of the last two chapters.

As always,

Enjoy

**Slightly Inappropriate**

It was dango day.

"Kakashi, do you want to have kids?" Sakura gave him the once over. "I mean you _can still_ have kids right?"

Kakashi frowned. "Sakura, I'm not old."

"And kids?"

He shrugged. "I don't see the problem with them."

"Well...I didn't expect that." She chewed thoughtfully on her food. "What's your reason?"

"Our duty to the village." He replied quickly and unconcerned. "Why do you ask, are you thinking about kids? You _are_ getting older."

Sakura snorted. "I don't want any, duty or not, old or not, but my mother's been pressuring me. Maybe I should just get artificially inseminated. It could be kind of fun going through that catalog."

"Or you could ask someone." Kakashi pointed out. "Do the whole mother-father scenario."

Sakura made a face. "That's one big hell no, Kakashi. Who would I ask – you?"

"I'd be willing, you know to do my duty."

Sakura snapped her hand down suddenly very nervous. "You know you're right, artificial insemination is the way to go."

**A/N:** Kakashi may be a bit OOC, but I don't think so. I mean he is 40 years old and he could want kids…you know to do his duty and carry on his line. Guys are all about carrying on lines in Naruto.


	28. Merits of Good Sex

**Standard disclaimer applies**. I know. I know. It's been forever since I've updated. It was my laziness again. Sorry.

I've also come up with a new story idea. I won't post it until after this story is finished, and I am aware that I have to finish both _Scarecrow_ (God, help me with that one) and _Totally Transparent_ (which shouldn't be that much longer…as I don't have a lot to work with) but I can't help myself. Plot bunny got to me.

Anyway, what do y'all think about a Bridget Jones's Diary parody featuring Sakura as the main character and Kakashi in Mark Darcy's role? It won't be an AU so it wouldn't be a _complete_ parody of Helen Fielding's novel, but if anyone is interested I can send you the first chapter as a sneak-peak.

As always,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"You need a vacation, Sakura." Tsunade commented when Sakura walked in.

"Damn right I do, shishou."

Tsuande eyed her up and down from above her reading spectacles and smirked. "And maybe you need good sex too."

"What the hell?" Sakura bellowed. Shizune stumbled into the room with wide eyes, poison needles out.

"What's wrong?" Shizune panicked.

The other women ignored her entrance.

"It's a good stress reliever, but I won't go into since you know my policy of preaching to the choir." Sakura knew she, in fact, had no policy, but sometimes it was wiser just to shut up.


	29. Invitations

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Thank you for the reviews. I'm so glad that some of y'all appreciate my warped sense of chapter is small continuation of the last one. I promise the chapters will get longer again soon.

As always,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Naruto, do you think I need to get laid?" Sakura asked lowering her head to the counter and looking up at him.

Naruto flushed and chocked on his ramen. "Is that an invitation, Sakura-chan?"

She was up in a half a second, her fist in his face. "Care to repeat that, Naruto?"

From the ground there came a murmuring noise sounding like, "I'd rather not."

"Good, because I'd hate to tell Hinata."

"I was just kidding. Jeez, maybe you do need to get laid."

A second fist swung his way.


	30. Blue Balls

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Okay, this is probably going to be the last one for the week since I'm going out of town - again - for the weekend. I know I've been slacking, but thank you all for sticking around and reading.

The plot bunny for this little chapter was inspired by a text from **TextsFromLastNight **so I can't claim complete originality. I was going to post another snippet, but decided to give y'all one with Kakashi in it. Love you guys!

As always,

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

Sakura leaned on her palm, elbow resting on the table, as she recalled one of the best events of her life. Around her were Ino - who'd already heard the story plenty of times so wasn't quite as enthralled - Shikamaru, Genma, and Kakashi who all were _eagerly_ awaiting the conclusion of her story.

"And so things were getting hot and heavy by that time – position 42 of _Icha Icha Paradise _is hardly easy, but when I asked him if he had a condom, as if he were that great I'd forget about it, you know what he said?"

Genma grinned shamelessly. "Probably what I've said a couple of times." He looked around his fellow men as if to get a high five. It was disgusting. Shameful even.

Shikamaru looked mildly disgusted with the whole conversation, but was either too lazy or indifferent to leave replied, "Just a couple?"

"Anyway," Sakura continued shooting a glare at the two men. "He said he didn't have a condom." The pink haired woman snorted. "He didn't fucking have a condom. So what if I'm on birth control? As if he would get the privilege of cumming in me. Bastard."

"And you said?" Kakashi said interrupting her train of malevolence thoughts, his voice bland and expression blander while Ino straightened as if she had come to some type of personal epiphany.

Sakura ignored this in favor of leaning back, a satisfied smirk on her face. "I said: That's great because I'm ready to be a mom. He didn't stay very long after that."

The table burst into laugher with the exception of Genma whose only reply was a sad, "I feel really bad for the guy's balls. Blue balls suck."

The table, even she herself, agreed.


	31. Love and Lust

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Sorry again. I know I've been MAJORLY slacking. As you know, or hopefully were aware of, I was out of town for the weekend. Then I was in a grips of a major…Well, before I get too far into the details of what exactly was wrong with me let me just say I was sick. That's all y'all probably want to know. It was horrible.

And again if any of you guys have any situations you want to see Sakura in just tell me.

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"I was in love once." Shizune confessed gazing into her drink.

Sakura gagged. "What, you seriously were? I mean...Oh, with whom?"

Shizune glared at the younger kunoichi. "His name was Izumo."

"And what happened? Did you at least have sex with him? He didn't break your heart did he, the cheating douche-bag!"

"We were nine." Shizune said offended.

Sakura slumped down onto the table. "That is the lamest story I've ever heard."

"Sorry, not all of us can have Sasuke level stories."

Sakura laughed. "Now, now, Shizune, don't be jealous."

"It's not like you had sex with Sasuke either."

Sakura nodded. "True, but I had some wicked fantasies."

"I'm kind of appalled."

"Hey," Sakura leaned back and smiled. "The guy may have been a bastard, but he was fucking hot."

"And so goes the story of your first love," Shizune sighed.

"And first lust, more importantly."


	32. Applied Icha Icha

**Standard disclaimer applies. **Probably last chapter for this week as I am going out of town yet again.

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Page fifty-three."

Sakura flipped to the page. "Ugh. Really? I thought you'd chose page one twenty-three."

Kakashi flipped open his copy _Icha Icha Tactics _vol. 3 once more. "That seems…" he paused and smiled, "strenuous."

"Maybe for old men." Sakura retorted loftily.

"I'm only forty."

Sakura though wasn't paying attention flipping through her own orange book. "Have you ever tried the position on one fifty?"

"Have you?" He asked regarding the picture.

"You're a perv, _sensei_, to ask your sweet student such a naughty question."

"I'll take that as a yes." Sakura merely laughed and shrugged.

"How did we end up flipping through sexual positions in _Icha Icha Tactics_?" Sakura asked wondering how she found herself trading experiences of applied sexual positions from _Icha Icha_ with Kakashi. Not that she was complaining, but this wasn't exactly their standard fare.

Kakashi closed his book and leaned back against his couch all too happy to answer. "You were bored and knocked on my door thirty minutes ago that book," he pointed to her copy, "in hand and that bottle of sake," he pointed to his coffee table, "in your other hand."

"Oh yeah." Well, she had been bored, and Kakashi was as good as any friend to bother. Okay, he was more fun to bother.

Kakashi leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, and a strange light in his eyes. "Still bored?"

Sakura took something out of her bag to distract her from the fact that her heart, so calm a moment before, was now rapidly pounding in her chest. Instead she smiled hiding her sudden nervousness. "Not when I pop this into your T.V."

In her hand, she held _Icha Icha Tactics_ the motion picture.

If Kakashi wasn't sure before he knew now without a doubt that he loved her.

**A/N:** I gave you a little insight there at the end of what Kakashi really thinks. Maybe y'all think it's too soon, but in this story he's loved her for a while. One day I might do a spin-off series of this story, but more than likely that would never happen.


	33. Too Emotional

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

Hello, everyone! It's been a long time, but I'm finally back. Summer school has been, excuse my language, a bitch. A little over twelve weeks of organic chemistry does horrible, unspeakable things to people. And, actually, it's technically not over. Tomorrow (erm, today?) is the final, but I'm so over studying.

I'm sick of it.

I'm done.

Okay, now that I'm done venting let's get to it.

Slash, I don't remember the order I wanted to post these next snippets in, but I don't think it really matters so we'll just go with it.

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"Anbu?" Sakura lifted her head from the counter and pinned Naruto with a hard stare.

"Yes!" The blond exclaimed. "Have you considered, you know, joining it?"

"What do you mean have I considered it?"

For a second the blond looked a bit flustered as if the statement escaped him by accident. "It's the next step, isn't it? And you're good, Sakura, really good. The amount of A-ranked missions you've gone on alone exempts you from the required three recommendations anyway."

Sakura crossed her arms. "You just don't want to apply for it by yourself," she teased.

"That's not true!" Naruto vigorously rubbed his hair with both hands, an endearing habit of his since childhood. "We're a team, I just want…"

"I get what you're saying, Naruto." Sakura said gently in a tone she hardly used anymore. "But do you really think Anbu is for us? No doubt we'd kick ass, but we aren't really the silent, killing type. We're more the 'what the fuck are you doing with that weapon', 'don't throw away your life for revenge, dumb-ass', and the 'you're about to go down because look how strong I am compared to you, maggot' type of people."

"You two aren't good with following directions either." Sai chimed in sitting down next to them, a blank smile on his face. "You'd be dead in no time."

"What'd you say, Sai-bastard?" Naruto yelled standing up and toppling his chair. Sakura rolled her eyes. "I'm the best at following directions…when they make sense and aren't dumb!"

"And explained slowly," Sakura added with a smirk. The comment went over the blonde's head.

Sai nodded to no one in particular. "Too emotional too, and besides," he smirked, "Kakashi would never let _you_ join."

This last comment was aimed at her, and because of it her blood pressure shot through the roof.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sakura tapped her foot on the ground.

"Sakura, you can't come to me for everything." Sai said shaking his head. "Really, think for yourself."

"You can get yourself your own girlfriend, Sai!"

At this Naruto blinked and turned towards their pale teammate. "You want a girlfriend?"

"I'm going to kick Kakashi's old ass the next time I see him!" Sakura roared ignoring the blonde's question. How dare Kakashi stop her? Who did he think he was? It was because she had a vagina, wasn't it? Damn the curse-ed petals of womanhood! Kakashi was a sexiest pig. She'd show him! Ya!

In her anger she failed to realize that Kakashi had never said anything of the sort, but Sai wasn't about to inform her about that little detail. The scene she was making was much too amusing so instead he opted for a different approach.

"See," he said to Naruto who appeared to be in the middle of some emotional crisis. "Too emotional."

"I'll show you emotional!" Sakura screamed and suddenly fists started swinging.

Unfortunately, Naruto wasn't able to escape in time.

**A/N:** I noticed that I have a disturbing theme whenever Naruto is present. The poor guy always gets smacked. Oh, well.


	34. Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

This chapter kind of refers back to the chapter where Tsunade told Sakura she probably needed to have sex, as well as the chapter after that. Anyway, you know how rumors are in my version of Konoha…

This chapter is a bit rough, but I hope you'll like it anyway.

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"Sakura, nice to see you here." Kakashi greeted with a smile in his voice. "You too, Ino."

"Hey, Kakashi-sempai." Ino greeted back drinking her tea. Sakura, on the other hand, didn't bother looking up.

"What the hell do you mean nice seeing you? You make it sound as though we haven't seen each other in months." Ino frowned and shoved her a bit. Sakura frowned back chewing on her dango thoughtfully.

"I've been out of the village three days. You didn't miss me?" Kakashi tried to make his one visible eye look as hurt as possible.

"To be honest, I didn't know you were gone." Sakura shrugged and missing the flash in his eye. Ino didn't but like hell she would say anything. Sometimes it sucked being able to read people so well. She blamed her clan's genes.

"Nice to have you back." Ino said getting up and flashing the Copy-nin a blank smile. "Anyway, Sakura I got to go. See ya!"

"PIG, YOU DIDN'T PAY!"

If one thing could distract Sakura from dango bliss it was money, but Ino was already gone and there was no way in hell she was going to leave her dangos with Kakashi. He would eat them to spite her.

Kakashi motioned for her to leave. "Go get her. I'll protect your food."

Sakura snorted. "You'd eat them."

The man sprawled out against his chair, stretching out his body, and crossing his legs at the ankles. "So you say."

Sakura swatted his leg with her own appendage. "So I _know_."

"That one time only happened because you stole my plant." Kakashi explained as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "And I happen to like my plant where he is. On his window sill."

"How do you know it's a he?" Sakura shot back amused. "Besides, you found Mr. Ukki an hour later."

"Being attacked by children."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "It was one little girl and she was watering your plant."

"It's the principal of the matter."

"You need a life." Sakura pointed out.

Kakashi leaned forward till he was very close to her face and his eye crinkled in a smile. "And I hear that you need to get laid. Any offers?"


	35. Virginity

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

Thank you for reading and reviewing. It makes my day knowing that I have some of you people laughing. (Or at least smirking.)

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"Shino lost his virginity."

"You're shitting me, right?" Sakura silently screamed leaning forward.

"No, I was there." Kiba whispered copying her forward motion.

Sakura blinked, then laughed, and backed away with a wide smile. "First, gross. Second, I didn't know you swung that way." Kiba's smile fell away realization dawning. He started shaking his head backtracking.

"Sakura, I didn't - "

"Third, I would tell Ino, but I think Sai's already gone."

True to her word, the seat next to her was empty. The seat previously occupied by one dark haired, emotionally stunted shinobi.

"Fuck me!"

"I think that's Shino's job." Sakura teased.

Kiba gave her one last glare before taking off after Sai. Life was too damn good at times Sakura thought leaning back in her seat. So good in fact Sakura decided to treat herself to another shot of whiskey.

**A/N:** Now I feel like a Jack and Coke. Who wants to join? Haha.

_Public Service Announcement:_ If you don't drink, keep it that way. It leads to horrible life choices.


	36. The Very Bad, No Good Conversation

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

This chapter is a start to something different, a start of a new idea, a new beginning for Sakura. I am going to begin slowly opening her up to the possibility of a relationship with Kakashi.

It's probably high time, but, as all authors, I am not completely satisfied about how I am introducing the subject. Sakura is pretty dense regarding our darling Copy Ninja. Good thing her dear, ole' pal Ino has a knack for reading people.

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

An important conversation, that's what Ino said she wanted to have. Of course, hindsight was a hell of a thing.

Sakura should have realized that an important conversation for Ino was, in reality, not very important at all. Enlightening at times, humorous at others, her conversations were nevertheless irrelevant, wasteful activities.

"Sakura," the blond sang a little too nicely when she opened door. Sakura shivered stepping in and wondered if it was a bad omen. "It's been too long since we've last talked."

Wishing she had a watch so she could look down at it impatiently, Sakura sighed rubbing her eyes. "Pig, we saw each other yesterday. Remember you abandoned me with Kakashi and didn't pay your bill?"

"Oh, I'm sure you kids had a great time." Ino waved her off. There was an unholy gleam in her blue eyes. "How did it go?"

"What do you mean how did it go?" Sakura answered slowly trying to think of a good excuse to leave. She had a bad feeling about this conversation.

"You and Kakashi," Ino pushed passing Sakura a beer. "You two talk about anything interesting?"

"Why are you so interested?" Sakura said a little defensively. Ino's smile widened. It reminded Sakura of the time Ino found her mother's cosmetics box when they were kids.

"Can't I be interested in what my friends talk about?" The blond countered.

Sakura raised her brow. "Why are you interested now?"

"Can't you answer just one question without another question?" Ino's voice lost some of its placidity.

"Why are you asking so many questions?"

Ino seemed to suddenly switch tactics. "Do you like anyone right now, Sakura?"

"What the hell, Pig? First, you ask weird questions about Kakashi and now you want to know if I like anyone. If I didn't know any better I'd say that…" Sakura rolled her eyes. "You're crazy, Ino. That's not going to happen."

"You're avoiding the question." Ino accused.

"I'm avoiding pointless, thoughtless questions, yes." Sakura growled back. She didn't like the tight feeling in her chest whenever she thought of Kakashi, her ex-sensei, in that particular light.

The blond shrugged. "There is no such thing as a pointless question, my dear. I think you're hiding something."

"_Really_…" Sakura couldn't believe this conversation was happening. Ino's mind was an intricate labyrinth of ridiculousness.

"You don't even think he's attractive?" Ino began again.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "I'm not blind, Ino." Not that she was about to say that blindness was lifted only somewhat recently…because of special lighting. That sounded dumb.

"So you like him then."

"NO!"

Sakura bit her lip. At least, she hoped she didn't.

She hated Ino's important conversations. Nothing came from them except self-doubt, self hatred, and, more than likely, for some helpless person, STDs.


	37. Very Special Gifts

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

Thanks reading, reviewing, and laughing. This chapter refers back to _Virginity_. Ah, when will Sakura learn not to mess with Shino?

As always,  
Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate **

"You bought me condoms." Shino's ever monotone voice broke the silence.

"Word on the block is that you lost your V-card. Congrats! Let's go drinking."

"No."

Sakura pouted. "But the whole gang is waiting. We bought decorations and everything!"

"That is the exact reason why it is wiser not to go."

"You're going." Sakura rolled up her sleeves.

Shino copied her motion. The difference was that no bugs came out of her sleeves and she left soon after that.

It was better sometimes to give up and send Kiba instead.


	38. Handy Talents

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

1. Sorry for taking so long!  
2. Thanks for all the reviews.  
3. Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Whoa. _Whooa_." Sakura said pushing her hands out in front of her for physical emphasis. "You want _me_ to go on an S-ranked mission with _you_?"

"You're qualified to accompany me on the mission." Kakashi explained flipping through his book looking very much indifferent. "And Tsunade-sama has already ok-ed the idea."

"But why?"

Kakashi smiled. "Your talents would be quite handy."

"My ability to obliterate things would be an asset, on a S-ranked mission?" Which didn't make sense at all. S-ranked missions required finesse, and while she could manage something of finesse her style had always been loud and destructive much like her dear mentor.

"While impressive I'm talking about your genjutsu, Sakura."

"Oh, they are pretty kick ass too." Sakura conceded. And they should be since she'd been cultivating her genjutsu talents since she was eighteen with Kurenai. "But why should I accept this mission?"

"To spend time with me?" His eye flickered up from his book to settle on her.

Sakura picked her ear unimpressed. "Try again."

"Bragging rights?" Kakashi's rubbed the back of his neck.

"Eh, I have plenty of those already."

"The pay is worth six A-ranked missions."

She paused. "_Hell_, why didn't you say that in the first place, Hatake? Of course, I'll go with you! You didn't even have to ask."

"But I did have to ask."

She smiled. "Eh? I don't remember."


	39. Flattering Missions

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

Enjoy!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Shishou!" Sakura bellowed barging into her mentor's office, a red-sealed mission scroll clutched tightly in her hand.

Tsunade lounged in her chair, a sake cup carelessly held between her fingers, and yawned quietly covering her mouth. "Yes, Sakura-_chan_?"

"Next time why don't you just send me on a suicide mission and get it over with." Sakura growled slamming her scroll down on a mess of paper.

Tsunade arched a perfectly manicured brow before calling out to her assistant. "Izumo, next time you let this creature barge into my office there will be hell to pay. Is that understood?"

There was a very un-masculine squeaking noise followed by a quick _'yes, Tsunade-sama'_ before the door clicked shut.

"Sakura, you know I can't just kill you off – your talents are hard to come by, my cute student."

"You get some sort of kick by sending me to deal with _him_, don't you, shishou? Fess up!"

Tsunade leaned back pressing her lips and fingers together. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You know what I'm talking about." Sakura whispered harshly holding up the mission scroll assigned to her earlier that morning. "He always, without fail, tries to sleep with me! He has some sort of pink hair fetish or something – actually, not something. He told me point blank that he liked women with pink hair, and since I'm basically the only woman in a hundred kilometer radius that has pink hair you can imagine how _flattered_ I am."

Tsunade scoffed. "You could do worst than the second son of our daimyo. Besides," she shrugged, "he requests you specifically and pays enough money to give his missions A-rank status. Your bank account should be thankful."

"The pay is good." Sakura mused anger all but forgotten as Tsunade sipped her sake.

"Until the next time, Sakura?" Tsunade said looking over at her _now _pacified pupil.

"I can't promise I won't castrate him."

Tsunade tapped her nails along the desk. "It's probably best if you refrain from doing that, Sakura."

Sakura pushed on undeterred. "But you can see my point, right?"

Tsunade regarded her student's hopeful expression and felt an evil smile twist her lips. "Maybe you should just sleep with the man, Sakura." Her student's face fell. "You know make sure you thoroughly complete your mission."

"Shishou!"

"You're young. You have to keep your options open."

Sakura could barely retain her temper. "You sound like Ino," she managed to ground out after a while.

Tsunade nodded seriously. "Always liked that girl."

"I'm going," Sakura said throwing up her hands, spinning on her heel.

"Have a _safe_ trip, Sakura-chan!" Tsunade called after her as the door slammed behind her.

"Shove it, shishou!" Sakura yelled from down the hallway.

A moment later, Shizune, Tonton in her arms, came wandering in looking from the hallway to the office. Tsunade snickered drinking her sake.

"You really shouldn't tease her so much, Tsunade-sama." Shizune frowned. Tonton oinked in agreement.

The older woman threw her legs on her desk. "I got to get my kicks in somehow, Shizune."

"You gamble and drink." Shizune pointed out confused.

"That doesn't count."

Shizune sighed, "I guess it doesn't."


	40. Blood Rush

**Standard disclaimer applies**.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving (or day for those who aren't American)! This is a repost because I just realized I posted something along these lines a few chapters back. What can I say? Ino is very presistent.

**Slightly Inappropriate**

"Okay, so I've been meaning to tell you this for a long time…"

Sakura grunted in no mood to humor Ino, but because she was a good friend she decided to lower her book and listen. But damn did she hate listening.

"What are you going to say, Pig? Spit it out."

See. Good friend.

Ino wasn't inclined to agree by the look on her face. "This is why I never talk to you, Forehead."

"What does that mean? You always talk to me. You never shut up!"

Ino leaned her head onto the table and looked out the window. "You sound like my ex-ex-ex-boyfriend."

Sakura's nose wrinkled. "He was the douche-bag king."

"My point excatly." Ino said with a meaningful poke. "I don't know why he likes you."

Wait. What just happened? Did she just miss an entire piece of the conversation?

"Who likes me?" Sakura ventured, a tad frightened and a bit annoyed as a previous conversation they had came to mind.

Ino waved her hand. "It's just a suspicion I've had for a long time is all." _Oh, God._ Ino paused and looked around as if she was about to divluge all of Konoha's secrets. "And Tenten agrees."

Sakura moved her book from her lap to the table and regarded her blonde friend with unease. "Well, since you and Tenten agree it has to be a fact. Who is this mystery man?"

_It better not be Kakashi._

Ino's flippant answer made Sakura drop her book. "Hatake Kakashi, of course. Come on, Sakura."

Sakura choked despite herself. "I think we've already had this conversation, Ino, and settled it."

Ino leaned back against her chair watching her friend choke on what seemingly was air. It was awkward and had to stop soon.

"We did not settle it. Nothing was settled. You just stormed out. Now, I know he is a bit difficult to read being so mysterious and masked and all, but trust me when I say that he like-likes you." Ino pointed out unhelpfully.

Sakura's head hurt with the sudden rush of blood to her brain. "_Like-like_?" Sakura rolled her eyes. "Ino, really now. Kakashi of all people? He thinks I'm vulgar and crass, as I've already stated about a thousand times."

"He's vulgar." Ino shot back. "He reads those Icha Icha books in public."

Sakura tilted her head. "That's pervy not vulgar."

"Tomato, tomato. He isn't crass in the same way you are I'll give you that," Ino said nodding generously. "But maybe he's into that type of thing. You always used to see him with those loose women."

"I think there might be an insult in there somewhere." Sakura's muttering was largely ignored by Ino who continuned speaking.

"Plus, he always hangs out with you."

"He also hangs around the memorial stone, but I don't think he wants to marry it." Sakura couldn't help but say. Ino glared.

"Just trust me on this." Sakura opened her book again. "Sakura." Something in Ino's voice made her look up again. "He laughs with you."

A moment passed in silence, and in that moment Sakura felt fuzzy. He laughed with other people too right? Not as much as with you her inner voice intoned deciding to make an appearance. Whatever. This was not her concern. She shouldn't be contemplating Kakashi. It was weird. He was a friend, like a hot older brother…Yeah, she would stop thinking right now.

"The bastard laughs at me, Ino, not with me."

Because God help her if Hatake Kakashi was actually interested.

And damn Ino for bringing it up again!


	41. Off the Books

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

V. well aware that these little snippets are getting a bit out of control, but I just love the craziness (especially Sakura being completely oblvious to everything). Beware of later chapters. Haha.

** Slightly Inappropriate**

"This mission is off the books, Sakura. Strictly on a need to know basis." Tsunade hunched forward, her eyes dark and earnest.

Sakura was less than impressed. Missions like this didn't phase a seasoned kunoichi like her. It also helped that she knew Tsunade's defintion of 'off the books'. So instead of getting excited she picked her ear instead.

"You know, Sakura, this mission requires a bit more respect than what you're showing."

The pink haired woman straightened and smiled at her shishou. "You need me to go pay off some debts, don't you? Don't want the elders knowing?"

Tsunade snorted leaning back. "Can you blame me? If the elders knew they wouldn't let me out of their sight, and Shizune has been bad enough."

"I guess I'll be gambling again."

"How else does you make fast money?" Tsunade asked archly. "How is it that my cute student has surpased me in games of chance?" Her sigh was both sad and proud.

"It wasn't all that hard really." Sakura prodded antagonistically. Tsunade threw her a dirty look.

"Since you already know the drill, I'll be brief. You'll be heading to mountain village Ichiimari tomorrow at 0600 hours and meeting your contact at the Aamaru Bridge. From there he will introduce you to all the people you need to know and provide you with lodgings. The rest is the usual and described in this scroll." Tsunade said handing her a much smaller than usual mission scroll.

"How much am I getting paid for this?"

"The standard B-rank payment, but also whatever else you win." Tsuande said sounding jealous.

"This is going to suck." Sakura said stuffing the scroll into her jacket pockets. "A B-rank payment and gambling with old farts….ugh."

"I would say don't drink." Tsunade began leveling Sakura with a smirk. "But that's like asking the sun not to rise. Just get me my money and get home, drunk or not."

Sakura laughed making her way out. "You know my policy on drunk running, shishou."

"What policy? You don't like running period."

Sakura nodded. "That's true, but I still don't really want to go. It's only a B-rank…"

"I could sweeten the deal as well, if you want. Throw in Hatake to keep you company."

Sakura scruntched up her face. "How is that excalty sweetening the deal? Besides, you know how Kakashi is."

"Excalty." Tsunade voiced strangely mysterious. "Besides, any mission with Hatake as a member is an automatic stamp of approval from the elders – nothing fishy at all about it, even if it is off the books, and you know those damn elders always end up knowing everything. Is nothing sacred anymore?"

"It's their job," Sakura voiced annoyed. Then: "Wait. Are you saying I'm fishy?"

"Anyway, he needs a vacation." Tsunade continued ignoring her student's previous outburst.

"No, I'm the one who needs a vacation."

Tsunade eyed her over. "No, you still need sex. Ask Hatake."

Grr.


	42. The Other Woman

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

Got the 'seasoned' part of this chapter from a reviewer, though I'm sorry to admit I don't remember his/her username. Thank you anyway!

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sakura hated tracking.

It was all good and fun for the first hour or so but after a while it just gave her the scratch because, for one, she had better things to do. Yeah, she could have asked Kiba and Akamaru for help, but they were worse than annoying. Besides, she already had Ino and enough was enough.

"Again, you didn't have to come along." Sakura pointed out peeking inside a dark alleyway.

The blond shrugged. "I'm just glad to see you trying to find Kakashi. Are you going to confess to him?"

Sakura arched a brow. "I have nothing to confess." At least, nothing that he wanted to hear. "Besides, Tsunade is the one who's making me find him."

"Why?"

For a mission that's off the books – though a vacation for him.

"Hell if I know."

Again, tracking Kakashi sucked. He could never be found when she actually wanted to find him…

Ino's hand gripped her upper arm.

"Sakura, don't look behind you." She gasped.

The pink haired kunochi looked behind her and squinted. "Is that Kakashi?"

"With a woman."

Sakura turned back to her friend with a raised eyebrow. "It's been a while since I've seen that, I hope he uses a condom."

Something uneasy settled into the pit of her stomach. Indigestion?

"You're not going cry or yank him away from that woman?"

"No, but I am a bit...weird-ed out. Wait, why would I be crying or ruining his night?" Even though that could be kind of fun...for reasons she didn't want to delve in. That weird feeling in her stomach gave a little lurch with the idea.

"Because you're secretly in love with him, idiot!"

Sakura sniffed crossing her arms. "Stop placing your fantasies on me, Ino. Last time you did that I lost my virginity."

"That wasn't me - you just made a bad life choice but," she all but sang, "I would approve of Kakashi."

Sakura's glance flickered over to the white haired man, caught his steady gaze, and blushed. Yeah, definitely indigestion.

"He's a bit old." Though Sakura didn't really believe it she prayed that it would shut Ino up.

"Not old - seasoned, but that's a good thing." Ino whispered staring at Kakashi appreciatively. "I bet he's sexy as all hell underneath that mask. You know I've heard rumors that he knows how to treat a lady right."

Sakura watched Ino try to wink.

"So what you're saying is that my ex-sensei is a sex god who's pleased every women he's ever touched? Yes, that really makes me what to jump his bones." Worst part of it was that it kind of did, if only to see how seasoned he actually was venereal disease aside.

"Plus," Ino continued, "he gives you _looks_."

Sakura very non-seriously pondered her friend's statement all the while thinking that she needed a new best friend, one that wouldn't bring up Kakashi at every possible moment.

"If he was interested, Ino, he wouldn't be giving me looks. He'd be buying me lotto tickets, because those mean a hell of a lot more to me than _looks_. Besides, if he's interested why is he with her?"

Ino rolled her eyes. "Where do you think we are - some romance novel?"

**A/N:** Oh, another woman? Or is there something more going on here?


	43. The Art of Tracking Prey

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

I'm sure all of you guys can tell (or if you don't then you will soon) these past chapters, through no will of my own, are turning into a little arc. Don't know what to name it yet, but am very sure something will come to mind soon.

**Slightly Inappropriate**

Sakura somehow managed to lose Ino, follow Kakashi, and guzzle down two bottles of beer at the same time. Not to mention, send some children hateful glares when they sat judging her as she downed said bottles of beer. Hey, she had to keep up with Kakashi, but what was a girl to do when she was thirsty?

Thankfully, he and the mystery woman parted ways soon after that. They shared no prolonged gazes, no secret smooches – though this was Kakashi, she mused – but still nothing seemed…sexy. She was slightly disappointed and decided to focus on that part of her emotions rather than the other, larger portion that didn't really sit well with her and thus was ignored.

She was on him in a heartbeat.

"Hey, Kakashi."

True to character, the man wasn't even surprised. "Enjoy following me, Sakura?"

"Tracking is not one of my finer points." Sakura admitted falling in step with him. Kakashi glanced down at her and smiled. "It was one of the few lessons I barely passed."

"It takes a great deal of _patience_," Kakashi admitted feelingly. "And I have learned to be very patient over the years."

"Older people do tend to be patient," Sakura winked. "Anyway, Tsunade sent me to find you."

"Oh?"

"Oh," Sakura mimicked. "Yes, oh. On her orders, you're coming with me tomorrow to Ichiimari. 0600 hours, at the main entrance, don't be late."

Kakashi scratched his head. "The Hokage and that town are never a good mix. What's the occasion?"

"Tell me about it." Sakura's head dropped. "Anyway, take it as some sort of vacation for you, okay. She tells me you need one like I need sex."

"No offers?" Kakashi asked wickedly. "My offer still stands."

"Why don't you just stick a needle in my eye and be done with it, Kakashi." She shot back crossing her arms. Her attractiveness was always, and would always be, a sore spot for her. Unlike Ino she didn't have endless offers for sex or anything interesting really…except the daimyo's perverted son and the Kakashi's off colored jokes. "No one here appreciates my awesome assets, but tomorrow we'll be in some _exotic, foreign_ city and the prospects will be aplenty."

"Your sarcasm is endless, Sakura." Kakashi chuckled stuffing his hands into his pockets to keep from touching her. "I'm sure though you won't have time for…prospecting." She looked at him quizzically and he continued. "As I'm sure this isn't some sort of ordered vacation for you."

"Damn, right. It's work, and you better stay out of my way after we get there!"

"I'm surprised you haven't asked." Kakashi whispered suddenly, a little closer to her than he was before.

"Asked?" She blinked up at him with total guilelessness. Kakashi mentally groaned. She was more like Naruto than she knew.

"About the woman I was with," he said a little grumpily. "You're usually curious about everything I do."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Don't flatter yourself, Hatake. When have I ever been interested in your flavor of the month?" Sakura eyed him over suggestively as he crossed his arms. "Or the minute?"

"You'd be surprised by my stamina, Sakura."

Her stomach fluttered.

"Too bad I'll never find out, eh, Hatake."

It was also too bad Sakura turned her back. If she hadn't moved, she would have witnessed the determined look that passed through his eye.


	44. Six Truths

**Standard disclaimer applies.**

I really don't like this chapter very much, but hopefully someone will derive some enjoyment out of it. Oh, the landlady, drug dealer idea came from a reviewer.

**Slightly Inappropriate**

There were many truths in this world. Too bad Sakura hated owning up to them, but there was something to be said for honesty.

Truth # 1: she _really_ did want to ask Kakashi about the woman.

Truth # 2: never, ever had she taken an interest in one of his light-o'-loves before.

Truth # 3: like hell she was going to start being interested now.

Truth # 4: she was very much was interested now.

Truth # 5: Sakura refused to live up to Truth # 4; she wouldn't ask him. No way! Unless she ended up super wasted on this upcoming 'mission' and blurted out her interest. That was a distinct possibility.

Hmm.

Solution: don't drink.

Truth # 6: she was going to drink. The sun rose in the east and set in the west, after all.

And true to Truth # 4, the woman – who was she exactly? She could have been his landlady, drug dealer, or friendly neighbor who…

DRUG DEALER!

No, Kakashi didn't do drugs. Unless…did he have painful memories that he drowned out with hard drugs? Of course he had painful memories. This was Kakashi. He wore a mask, and if that didn't scream out deep, dark problems then what did? Far more important, the man should have been aware that alcohol was so much better for drowning out one's problems. It was liquid after all. Furthermore, why didn't he come to her if he wanted drugs? She basically ran the hospital. People were always trying to steal drugs from them one way or another.

Maybe an intervention was needed, Sakura mused folding some cloths into her pack.

There was a knock at the door.

"Sakura." Tenten's muffled voice called out. "Open up!"

"It's open." Sakura shouted back wondering what in the world the weapon's mistress wanted. There was the sound of the door opening and closing and soft footsteps before Tenten stepped into her room gazing around as if she was suddenly transported to some alien planet.

"Damn. You're so messy."

Sakura found that she had to agree; cloths were on every surface, books were sprawled out around the room amongst kick-knacks she had no memory of ever having. When was the last time she cleaned? "Dirty panties should go in the laundry basket, right? Damn. Always forget that."

Tenten laughed jumping onto her bed, bouncing a bit. "Going on a mission?"

"Not really," Sakura sort of lied. "More along the lines of a forced vacation, for Kakashi's sake." That was sort of kind of the truth.

"Oh, you're going with Kakashi?"

"More or less."

Tenten paused. "Make sure to pack condoms."

Sakura didn't have it in her to be mad. "Ino putting ideas in your head again, Tenten?"

The brown haired girl smiled throwing a half answer right back at her. "Sure, why not."

"Besides, I don't have any condoms, and if I did they're probably expired." Sakura admitted flapping out another shirt and bringing it to her nose to sniff. It didn't smell that bad. She threw it into the pack.

Tenten whistled. "That bad, huh?"

"You don't even know."

_Maybe I should have sex with Kakashi_, Sakura thought throwing some shorts into her pack.

Silence.

Tenten really had no idea why Sakura started screaming.


End file.
